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Columnists

Dear Santa...

By Jim Olsztynski
December 1, 2008
"All I want for Christmas is, well, a bunch of stuff," writes Editor Jim Olsztynski in his letter to Santa.



Santa, more than half a century has passed since I last asked anything of you, so you probably don’t remember me. In case you do, please accept this belated apology for all the damage done with that last request you granted. It was mostly Johnnie’s fault, and besides, can’t we let bygones be bygones.

The reason I’ve taken up pen again after all these years - in the interest of full disclosure I confess that I’m not actually using a pen, but one of those magical keyboards that didn’t exist the last time I wrote - but I digress.

In any case, very little of my wish list is for myself, which I hope you will take into consideration. Here it is:
  • A housing recovery much quicker than anyone is predicting.


  • Continued full steam ahead for the industrial PVF sector.

  • 99.99% fill rates.

  • Accurate paperwork.

  • No more layoffs.

  • No more hurricanes.

  • A banner year for ASA in membership recruitment and financial gain.

  • Less government paperwork.

  • More manufacturers selling through trade channels exclusively.

  • More contractors going out of their way to patronize the aforementioned manufacturers and their distributors.

  • More profits.

  • Fewer returns.

  • No defective products.

  • Some good economic news.

  • Green living by everyone.

  • Personal injury lawyers going bankrupt - or being shipped to Iraq.

  • More craftsmanship.

  • A blowtorch for frozen computer screens.

  • More facts.

  • Less gossip and rumors.

  • More logic.

  • Less anger.

  • Head cases seeing the error of their ways.

  • An end to tasteless plumber jokes.

  • More advertising in Supply House Times.

  • Less TV viewing.

  • More book reading.

  • More will power.

  • Fewer calories.

  • A scientific study showing asbestos and lead actually to be good for us.

  • More smart kids wanting to be plumbers and pipefitters.

  • Fewer smart kids going to law school.

  • A World Championship for the Chicago Cubs, or hell to freeze over, whichever proves easier to pull off.

  • A better spell checkur.

  • More telling it like it is.

  • Less PC silliness.

  • Wisdom.

  • Health.

  • Prosperity.

  • Happy children everywhere you look.

  • A putter that works worth a darn.

  • Peace on earth.


Thank you in advance.

Your faithful believer,
Jim

P.S. Not necessarily in that order.

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Jim is the former editor of Supply House Times.

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